Day 13- April 30, 2013

This will be a silly memory! so  wait for it.  today paula and i went for pedicures this afternoon.  we followed that by going to the Mexican restaurant next door to partake of an afternoon marguerite.  The waiter brought us to large drinks which resembled two swimming ponds.  I finished mine and half of Paula which has rendered me a bit inebriated.   This has gotten me to thinking of two great inebriations of my life.
The first started in Viet Nam. Started drinking with a few Australian troops in Pleiku. It was a Friday evening. Saturday morn we were in Sidney.  Some how we got on an austral military transport.  do not remember much of the weekend events but  Monday morning we were back in Pleiku.
The second bout  started at the officers club  at Fort Bliss in El Paso Texas.   We had just finished some exams for anesthesia school.  At the club celebrating where there were having a 2 for special on harvey wallbangers (in case you don't recall that is OJ, vodka and Galiano).  I bought ten, which means i consumed 20.  All i recall is  somehow getting to my apartment lying on my bed with one foot on the floor to prevent the room from spinning.

Not proud moments but memories none the less!

In vino verities but in harvey wallbngers there is embarrassment!!

Day 12- April 29, 2013

I rushed home from evening appointments to watch the final episode of an engrossing TV series.
Earliest memory of TV experiences would of course begin with rushing home from schoo in time to watch the Mickey Mouse Club.  Each episode had a "mini series" of which my favorite was "Spin and Marty" . It was about a boys dude ranch, with a girl's dude ranch across the lake.  The starring child actors were Tim Considine and Annette Funicello ( may they rest in peace).  Other early child hood  TV memories were of course Roy Rogers, the Sherri Lewis show, the Lone Ranger, the Merry Mail Man.  The list of course can on and on!  Another memory is that while we were watching the cowboy chases my brother and I would "ride" our "horses" which were the the arms of two big green chairs in what was referred to as the "front room".

Day 11-April 28, 2013

First, to my reader and especially to my niece Gina. In copying and pasting last night's blog I inadvertently missed the last line.  To Gina my apologies,  I have re edited it.  i love you dearly.

Now, today is the 5th Sunday of Easter I was privileged to preach at  the Masses.  It was also the weekend that 151 Children of our parish  received their First Holy Communion.  while my homily at the regular Masses does not directly address First Holy Communion I think it reminds us of a particular  demon we must confront to be worthy to receive Eucharist both for the first time or for the 10,000th time.

so in lieu of a memory i offer my homiletic thoughts:

The past two weeks has really challenged my faith.  In a very real sense the events of Boston have shattered my faith. Not my faith in God but rather my faith in humanity. It seems, to me, that the older the human race gets the farther away it draws itself from being fully human. People are so beset with the past that they possess no hope for the future. Anger from the past finds its way into the present and when it comes to a boil it can take over and  controls our action to such a degree that the future is taken away.  The future is taken away not only from those who have fallen victim to anger but the future is also taken from the ones who were consumed with anger.

So much has been written about the anger of the brothers, so much has been written about the anger of their family. So much has been written about the anguish of the victims. So much anger that it can easily flow into our lives.  I admit that I became angry and that my anger sometimes came out in crude statements articulated to friends and family. That is part of the phenomena of anger; of all the emotions we have anger multiplies itself most easily. Anger duplicates itself the fastest and more importantly anger lingers the longest.  A couple of weeks ago I presented a “teaching” in our Lenten series concerning the seven deadly sins.  My topic was anger. I ask the class to raise their hands if they had anybody in their family who harbored a long standing anger.  Everybody raised their hand. Proving that our problem with anger is not just experienced on the level of the geo political but it is profoundly experience so in our most intimate relationships. Anger is so ubiquitous one can conclude that it we are destined for it therefore, there is nothing we can do about it; In the face of anger we are impotent.

But then we get nudged, nudged by the nothing less than the word of God. The word of god particular expressed in today’s Gospel.

Today’s gospel has Jesus announcing his departure from the lives of the disciples.  In today’s gospel Jesus also announces his singularly new commandment Note the detail with which the Gospel begins “When Judas had left them!”  Judas was an angry man.  The source of his anger was jealousy, pride and greed. Judas .as all angry men let this anger get the best of him. It was from his anger that he betrayed Jesus.  His anger blinded him to the love of Jesus. It is significant though in that before Jesus could offer his new command, the command to love the anger had to depart.  For the reality is that Anger and love cannot coexist. Anger and love cannot abide in the same room; neither can it abide in the same person. When both are available only one will dominate. And which one dominates is a choice we must make.  A choice like all choices that has consequences.

If we choose to be angry we are then choosing not to love.  If we choose not to love then we are separating ourselves from Christ. If we separate ourselves from Christ then we will not be recognized as his disciples. If we are not recognized as his disciple amongst each other than ultimately we won’t be recognized by Christ nor hear  those long for words.  Enter, my good and faithful servant!

So much hinges on that choice that is unfortuantley often given to us..  Will we persevere in the faith of Jesus as Paul and baranabas did or will we let the hardship of hate and anger overpower us thus and limiting or impeding the Kingdom of God.

Will we be among those who recognize that god dwells in each one of us or will we allow our tears and our mourning and our wailing and our pain blind us to that sublime reality?  Will we be the beneficiary of the New Jerusalem or will we be restricted by the rubble of the old.

Yes the choice is always ours. The choice to hate with an unquenchable anger or the choice to love with a fathomless love.  Jesus chose the later with his last words being forgive them for they know not what they do.  It was through this kind of love that Jesus was able to conquer that anger that put him on the cross.  The question is always what choice you will make; I will try loving the rest is up to you!

Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est!!

Day 10- April 27, 2013

Facebook reminded me that today is the birthday of my niece Audra.  Therefore the memory is about my nieces Audra and Gina and my nephews Jerry and Joey.
Gina and Gerry are the oldest.  My first interaction with them was when i came home on a leave soon after their births. it was the holiday season so i volunteered as all good uncles dot to care for them on New years Eve so their parents could go out. They were both sound asleep when they were left in my care so i figured this would be an easy night.
  Not more than 15 minutes after their parents left, one arose out of her slumber. I walked the floor with her till she fell asleep. As soon as she did the other awoke. and so it went like that for the rest of the evening.  Gina awake, Jerry asleep, Jerry awake, gina asleep and the beat went on.
Joe and Audra came into life later.  The nest time i saw them they were all altogether .  Again, i was home on leave at Christmas time. they were all 4 trying to open their Christmas gifts when i imposed military discipline.  They each had to open their gifts in order, one at a time, and dispose  of the wrapping in a trash bag before the next gift was to be opened.  this was met with some resistance but they were obedient.
Today, Audra is a Physical Therapist,  Husband to Chris and mother of  ### ( paula told me to not publish children's name  for internet safety reasons) .
Her brother Jerry operates a successful martial arts school in Phoenix. Married to Elisa and father to$$$.   Joey was part of the NYPD, now  an officer in Garden City. His married to Jeanie the father o f%%%, ***and expecting another. Gina his sister, mother to @@@ who works to serve nourishing meals to school children
Suffice it to say I am extremely privileged to have all of them call me uncle.

La famiglia e più importante!

Day 9 - April 26, 2013

     On the calendar its says today is Arbor Day.  We are suppose to plant a tree, but since I am fundamentally against hard labor let it suffice to be a trigger of my memory.  Two trees  come to mind.
The first was an oak tree that grew in front of my grandparents home (Giuseppe and Dorotea).  We in fact lived above them in a red brownstone at 147 31 st.  Brooklyn.  The tree was visible from the bedroom I shared with my oldest brother.  It was a large tree under which my grandfather and the other men on the block would gather in the evening, sitting on crates, smoking crooked cigars and drinking their homemade wine. It also served as the drop off point for the crates of grape that would be delivered in the early fall.  The families had joined together to purchase the crates and from the tree they divided it. The tree was also the place where the mothers of the block congregated waiting for us to come home form school.
     The second tree was the fig tree my grandfather  tended to in the backyard.  He pruned it and covered it with tar paper in the winter  to protect it from the NYC winter. We enjoyed the fruit of the tree for many a meal. The tree was surrounded by a bench.  It was from this bench that I first witnessed death. I was sent by my grandmother to call my grandfather for supper.  I went to the tree which he was tending only to find him on the bench with his cap in his hand .  He had quietly passed doing what he loved best!

"I think I shall never see a poem as lovely as a tree"  Alfred Joyce Kilmer

"You can eat of any tree in the garden..." Genesis

Day 8- April 25, 2013

Today is the Feast if St. Mark.  St. Mark is the patron of Venice. So my memory is about Venice.
My first time to see Venice was in 1979.  It was  also my first trip to Italy. I was going in search of my roots and Venice was the first Italian city I visited. After an overnight train ride from Frankfurt I walked out of the train station and was overwhelmed with the sight and the sounds.  Being so overtired from the flight and train I searched out a pensione. Having found  one  I made my way to my 3rd floor walk up room for a power nap.  When i descended a mere two hours later, I was shocked to walk into a flooded  ground floor.  The attendent shrugged declaring  alta aqua!  I had managed to come during the season of  high water, an event that occurs annually with the flooding of the city.  Not wanting to wait i rolled up my pants took off my shoes and began my trek to the piazza San Marco.  Another great site of the golden facade of the ancient Byzantine Basilica. Two days in Venice started my love for the homeland of my ancestry.
 I would be making a lot more visits to Venice later  in life when I was stationed in the Italy with Paula from 1986 - 1989.

La Serenissima!!

Day 7 - April 24

Paula is away for a few days being the Secretary to the Alabama Library Association Conventtion.
She left me with no prepare sustenance, so my memory is about food.  As you know, food and drink is most important to the Italian culture.  Paula has become a true expert Italian culinary skills.  In the early years of our marriage she was  once in the kitchen with my mother.  She asked Mom her she makes her pasta sauce- my Mom replied _"I buy it in the jar!"
This was of course a complete surprise tome since i had found memories of the pot of "gravy" (some people call it sauce, the debate continues) on the stove each sunday morning.  It began with a battuto of veggies ( pepper, onions and garlic sautéed in olive oil).  The olive oil came in a gallon tin (foodies today would disparage it).  to that was added crushed canned tomatoes and some tomato paste (i don't see tomato paste anymore). while that was simmering the meat was being prepared.  Meatballs, veal shank, sausage. All pre-seared. then placed in the gravy pot.  My mother would make what was  she called Braciola. which i learned  latter on was misnamed.  Braciola is really a chop of  pork or veal.  what my mother , and aunts and all the other woman on the block was really making was a rollatini.  It was a pounded out  flank steak, into which was laid some garlic, parsley, oregano, and cheese.  It was rolled an tied with a string. Grilled off and also place in the pot.  the day would go on with that simmer.
On our return from Mass. we picked up the bread.  on our return home we would "sneak" dipping the bread into the pot.
All was good by the time dinner was ready!  another memory of that in the future!

"La famiglia benedica la tavola abbondanza,"

Day 6- April 23, 2013

Since today is  Shakespeare's birthday my memory concerns the  theater!  The first time I experienced theater was when my Aunt Annette (dad's youngest sister)  took us to Radio City Hall.  At that time circa 1958 you went to the Hall to see amovie that was followed by the Rockettes.  The movie was the Eddie Duchen Story (he was a pianist), the Rockettes danced magically, the organs  boomed.  the theater of course was lush with art deco ( which i have been bemused by ever since).  As a ten year old i was enthralled.
It was not until 7th grade that i returned to Broadway.  This time led by Mr. Scala, my favorite teacher of social studies.  He brought the class to a matinee performance of "The Miracle Worker".  I did not know then that i would fall in love.  The principle actors were Ann Bancroft who played Ms. Sullivan and Patty Duke who played Helen. We were sitting in the second row.  I recall a scene were patty slides the edge of the stage.  I could see here eyes clearly. the anguish that she portrayed was  real.  My eyes met hers and I fell in love.  I'm sure it was not reciprocal!  But  i did not only have a pubescent  love of Miss Duke but I started a love of live theater.  In the high school years to come i was fortunate to be able to see first hand and first run such great performances of  "the fiddler on the roof" and "jesus Christ superstar" to name two.

in my 20 and 30's  while in the Army i was active in "little theater productions, doing the "odd couple",  "Plaza suite", the "diary of ann frank",  "our town"  and "12 Angry men". My last performance was before we left Germany.  I played multiple parts (a truck driver, a preacher and a tree) in an avant garde play entitled "the Rimers of Eldritch".  we were fortunate to win the Eurcom recognition of best play, best production. best cast.

So in honor of Shakespear i end with:

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first, the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms.
And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon's mouth. And then the justice,
In fair round belly with good capon lined,
With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws and modern instances;
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side,
His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion,
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.

[edit]

Day 5- April 22, 2013

Today is earth day which is suppose to direct our attention toward  things nature. so my memory is of trying to make contact with nature.  One such moment was my short lived Boy Scouting career. I forget the troop number but  I, my brother Joe, my friend Robert and another scout Michael  were signed up to go to Scout summer Camp.  Ten mile River was the camp name.  Since we were the only ones from our troop to attend we were linked up with another "foreign" troop.  Having arrived first we took over an open faced lean to.  When the "foreign leaders" arrived we were evicted and assigned to two  pup tents  by the lakeside.  It proceeded to rain torrentially.  The water rose!  The tent, its  occupants and its content was soaked to the core. For the two week we were there it rained every day.  Thus I concluded that nature  or rather making contact with nature was not at all fun.  To this day I stay close to sidewalks. My disdain for things "natural" has been affirmed  many times. 

Nature is god's gift to man to be enjoyed at a distance!!

Day 4- April 21

Today is a sunday.  The gospel I proclaimed  related to the Good Shepherd.  Thus the homily was about vocations, since has been declared "Pray for Vocations Sunday"  So todays memory is about my dual vocations  marriage and the diaconate. The story of the first vocation.  While I was at SHAPE I had been fairly active in the military chapel.  I was in fact in in the process of discerning whether to leave the military in pursuit of religious life.  I was thus spending a lot of time in prayer in the little Catholic Day chapel.  there I met Paula who was an American chaplain's assistant.  The short story is we fell in love and married on June 19, 1982. (perhaps more about this on June 19)

After a long weekend honeymoon in the North Sea village of Coq sur Mere  I returned to my desk. there was a set of orders  transferring me to Landstuhl Hospital in Germany (this was not a promotion rather it was a punishment because I,  a Major,  had dared to fall in love and marry an enlisted soldier).  I recall reading the letter at my desk and going to the chapel to tell Paula. I stopped for a bit of reflection.  when there was tap on my shoulder.  It was the wife of a general who was part of the Catholic community at SHAPE.  She handed me an article about the diaconate formation of Trenton NJ. She said that I should look into this!

And thus God began his work on my second vocation. When I arrived at Landstuhl  I met the catholic chaplain Fr. Alcuin Greenberg, OSB.  (the Generals wife had contacted him) . He recruited me to do some work with him. One year later Paula and I were transferred to Fort Dix NJ which is located in the Diocese of Trenton.  During my in processing I had to register with the chapel. Upon doing so, I was led into the office of the Chief Chaplain, Father Col. Edward Speitel who in his Colonel voice told me that we have an appointment with the then Bishop of Trenton, John Reis. the next day (he had been contacted by Fr. Greenberg).  I demurely asked why, he said "we have to get the ball moving on getting you into the diaconate formation it starts in three weeks".  In the Bishops office, i was presented with an application, and interviewed by Fr. Mike Walsh, the diaconate director.  (they had been contacted by the Colonel Speitel)   Three years later i was ordained in the Cathedral of St.Mary in Trenton, NJ for service to the Archdiocese of the Military.  Now 31 years of Holy Matrimony and 27 years of Holy Orders

Deus vocat, vir respondet!

Day 3- April 20, 2013

Writing in retrospect at the end of the day allows one to keep things in perspective.  The day actually ended with a delayed birthday dinner with friend.  John and Candy, Dave and Ann, Betty along with Paula and Josh.
Friendship is at times fleeting and at times steadfast.  Friendship is what allows the memories to stay, linger and rejuvenate.
So the memory of the day is recalling friends of my youth.  Robert with whom I shared dreams! Billy with whom I shared subway rides to school. Gregory with him I shared a jovial spirituality!
As the years go on more and more people come into you life.  But ironically, less and less of them are friends!
Amici sara non dimenticando!

April 19-Day 2

The second memory that came to mind this morning was the first day of kindergarten.  Back then kindergarten was a whole day of school. After lunch we were instructed to place our heads on our desks close our eyes and  rest.   I took that to mean take a nap.  As a result of my "obedience" they asked my mother to take me out of school for a year.  She did not.  Because of  this I was always the youngest student in my class.  Until today that is,  I am now the oldest in my newest academic goal, seeking the license  in canon law.

The days of old were days of innocence, not so much today.  This week began with the bomb attack of the Boston Marathon. Today it ended when one culprit succumbed to the guns of justice and the other was taken into custody.  The former was 26 the later 19 years of old.  Troubled young men who hated more than they loved.  The challenge for me is to always remember that  "amor vincit omnia

The beginning

This being my 65th birthday I will begin this blog (diary) for a year reflecting thoughts, memories, feelings etc, etc.

On this day of my birth the Allies who had bound themselves to conquer the evil of Nazism and Fascism divided Germany  and ultimatly all of Europe.  The state of Israel was founded to give a homeland for the Jewish diaspora..  None of that, however,  had anything to do with me directly but  I have been interested in history all my life.
My birth occurred in the evening apparantly  because Dr. Milazzo the GP who delivered me showed up in a tuxedo i was told.
My first memory is  of watching my mother care for one of my younger brothers.  By the time the family was finalized there was 5 of us.  Joseph, myself, Gerald, Thomas and Robert.  My mother Theresa stayed at home while my father Joseph worked all his life as an auto mechanic.
While I write this my father who is on the verge of his 93rd year is in hospice care. Mother died in 2008.
So this brings me, to the thought of the day, my mortality. momento mori!!